The papers came in the mail the other day.
Papers telling me that I need to sign my baby boy up for Kindergarten.
How we got here so quickly I do not know. I didn’t realize how incredibly fast it would all happen. Or the emotions it would stir in my soul.
I remember his wrinkled body close to me in the hospital. His tiny fingers grasping mine. I didn’t know the depth of being a mom to a boy. The experiment in extravagant grace and steadfast work that would entwine us.
Now I know it won’t be long before his strapping body is too heavy to hold, and he’ll be filling out university application forms. {tear!}
I wonder if I’ve worked to fully give of myself to my son!?
Have I read enough books and taught enough Scripture? Does he know his letters and numbers and how to listen when a story is read and follow directions and let others go first and write his name without using all capital letters?
And I wonder what really is the best school option for HIM!? My rough and tumble, passionately emotional soon to be five year-old boy. Am I fit to take this boy becoming a man from point A to point Z right here in our own home?
No doubt that it is every parent’s job to train their children, to be their number one teacher and influencer in life- particularly in the ways of the Lord. (It’s what Deuteronomy 6 is all about.)
But, what about their education?
Come September, moms around the world will be watching their boys and girls of the same age as they climb on the bus, heads bobbing up and down, as they find a seat to fit themselves and their Angry Birds backpack. Great moms. Awesome moms- that sacrifice their time with their children, and dedicate hours to helping as they shine a much needed light in our school districts.
How do moms and dads choose that the big brick building at the end of the block is the best place for their children to learn… the place God has called them to be?
And how are others of us guided by God to teach our kids at home?
These are questions I’ve wrestled with. Questions I’ve seen in between the lines of many emails from you moms that are so much like me. We see the incredible honor and privilege of raising sons and daughters for the Lord, and we don’t want to mess it up with our schooling decisions.
For they are big decisions. We’re raising the next generation… future leaders and doctors and entrepreneurs.
And it’s easy to look around and feel like you have made or will make the wrong decision. For they are not “one-size-fits-all” decisions!
Have no doubt, God is raising up godly children- in our public, private (& everything in between) schools, as well as at kitchen tables around the world!
Each family, each individual, each situation… is unique, and God will use different means in different people’s lives.
It’s finding out His will for our own families that has many of us shaking in our boots!
Many of you know that God has led our family to homeschool our children. Our three oldest girls thrive at home (honestly, I think they’d thrive at school too, for they really enjoy learning). But, I’d be lying to say that when I looked at those kindergarten registration papers, I didn’t have to pray long and hard through our decision all over again.
And here’s where God has guided me…
We don’t keep our kids home because we’re afraid of what could happen to them at school, just as we don’t send them to school because we’re afraid that we won’t be good enough teachers or because we’re afraid of how others will label us. And we don’t do opposite of what God is calling us to because we’re afraid of what the mom down the block will think.
Yes, some of our fears are valid concerns and need to be looked at, but- our decision should not be based on fear!
We are to fear the Lord only, and there we find that “the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.” (Proverbs 9:10) Even wisdom in making the best school choice for our OWN families.
So, we seek His Word and we seek His ways and we seek His face- bringing all our concerns to Him, as we weigh countless pieces to this mixed up puzzle: our options… the cost… the time commitment… the strengths, weaknesses, personalities and special needs of each of our children (and ourselves)… our spouse’s desires… the “seasons” in our lives- including the health and dynamics of our family… our values and our goals… how we can be a witness and testimony… how we can continue to guard their hearts and fill their minds with truth- while all the while giving them wings… (most importantly) what we feel God is calling us to for now…
As God guides us to a decision, we can make it confidently… knowing that God has led others before us both in the same and the opposite directions, and knowing that God may lead us in a different direction in the future. (So let’s not waste our time judging or coveting.)
And then we must rest in knowing that God equips us for what He has called us to.
It may not be easy, but there is no better place to be than in the will of God!
Where and how has God led your family in the schooling of your children?
What questions do you have for me?
{{I’d LOVE to hear from you! Just a quick reminder to keep all comments encouraging and thoughtful- as this is an issue many of us parents really struggle with. For a little background… I’m a product of the public schools, had the joy of teaching in a private preschool, and now enjoy the blessings of homeschooling our children. Please know it is not my intent to force any one way of schooling on your family- instead, I hope you will feel encouraged. I’d be honored to pray with you over God’s will for your family!}}
I know how quickly time goes! My youngest will be a high school senior next year. I often wonder how my family would be different now if I had homeschooled. I salute you for your courage.
Enjoy your weekend.
I feel like I’m going to blink and I’m going to be right there with you… so bittersweet. ;) Thank you for your encouragement- I’m blessed to see how God works in our families wherever He has called us to be. Have a blessed week!
~Jessica
What a great post! I might need to read it again a few times. :)
We will be homeschooling “for real” this coming fall, registering with the state for the first time with our oldest in kindergarten. Thank you for the reminder that fear shouldn’t be a part of our decisions. I remind myself of that often too.
Thank you for your encouragement, Monica! How fun that we’ll both have kindergarteners come fall! I’ll be excited to hear more of your journey! :)
~Jessica
Wow. I needed to hear this- I LOVE homeschooling my kids (Pre-K, 3-yr-old preschool, and 17 months), but each year we pray diligently for how God would have us school our children the next year. I LOVED the comments about fear – we don’t keep our children home because of fear, AND we don’t send them to school because of fear. It’s all about God’s calling. Our former assistant pastor, who is now a missionary to Portugal, always used to say, “God doesn’t call the equipped. He equips the called.” So true!! And, for the record, I am homeschooling my VERY active 5-year-old boy (Pre-K this year), and I think it is great for him – in school, he would be forced to sit still much more than he is here- we work on self-control, but I’m a strong believer in learning by doing, and I love that he can do that so freely at home. :)
I just love how your three are such similar ages to my little three! I bet they’d have so much fun together! :)
And I love that quote from your assistant pastor- how very true!
So blessed that God equips us and guides us along the way!!!
~Jessica
what a great post! it’s so true that these decisions should not be made out of fear but out of what we feel called to do. fear is so often the first motivator to do things, and it shouldn’t be! we also homeschool and i struggle at times with the judgments from others mostly but when i remember that i am accountable for doing what is right for our family i know i’m making the right choice!
Thank you, Jen! Oh, how I need to continually be bringing my fears and worries and judgements from others to the throne of God! Praying for you as you do what God has called your family to do!
~Jessica
I am homeschooling 3 boys right now and it has been a JOY for the most part. Each child is different and comes with his own set of issues that we have to figure out and work to overcome. I’m thankful that we get to do that together and fashion each of their school days in ways that work for the individual.
My first two sons have been fairly easy to homeschool. (they are quick learners and for the most part easy to teach) My 3rd boy is not at all easy to teach. He’s smart as can be but his iron will is enough for me to throw in the towel at least once a week. I don’t push him at all, though. I know from experience that even if he’s behind at 6 years old – he’ll eventually catch up – even if it means he’s reading at a much later age than my other two. It’s not worth the struggle. He needs to move more and his imagination needs to be in action all the time! So, schooling him at 6 years old looks ENTIRELY different than schooling my other two when they were 6 years old. And that’s OKAY! If I can engage him for 30 minutes 3 times a week – I’m happy. I’m not sweating it!
Always so blessed to read your insight, Larissa! That is such a blessing of homeschooling- learning about your child and then being able to teach to them individually- right where they are at.
Hope you have a great day!
Jessica
I am homeschooling my oldest son in 1st grade with Heart of Dakota. We love it and he is excelling! But I am still unsure how we will school my youngest son who has special needs. I’m not sure if homeschooling will be the best fit, the only fit, or the worst fit. I pray God will make it clear as he approaches age 6 next year.
Praying for you and that God will make His ways clear for your family!!!
On a side-note… we love, love, love Heart of Dakota. I’d be so lost without them! That curriculum has truly been a gift from God for our family. How fun to hear that your oldest son is using it as well!
Blessings, Jessica
What a wonderful post. My kids have been in both public school and home schooled. It wasn’t an easy decision to make either way but I do feel it’s where God led me for each child.
Thanks for sharing, Ellen! What a wonderful perspective you have from following God’s lead to do both.
Blessings, Jessica
This is exactly the same situation we are facing right now! My 5 year old boy will be a Kindergartner in the Fall.. Still debating between homeschool or Christian school or something else? … Feel like God is leading us to homeschool, but worry about socialization for him as he is already very attached to me..
Praying for you right now Kristy- that God will make His will clear for your family! :)
I’d be happy to talk “socialization” issues over with you if you’d like, as that’s something we’ve been asked frequently in the last couple years.
Many blessings, Jessica
Hi Jessica,
This is a wonderful post, but one (kind of embarrassing) question…what if I don’t really know what Gods will is? How can I be sure? Keep praying? I feel overwhelmed not sure what the right thing to do is. Help!
Oh Beth, Don’t be embarrassed at all!!! ;0 I’ve been there too (& am there in other areas of my life)… seeking for what God’s will truly is. Especially when the answer is not cut and dry in the Bible- we want to do what pleases Him and we want to follow Him, but we don’t know where He is leading.
With schooling choices there are so many choices and so many people with opinions- it is incredibly overwhelming! So, yes, keep praying! But also realize that as we are seeking God, He loves to put His desires into our hearts. His desires, become our desires. Is there one way that you are leaning towards? All factors (money, location, fears, etc.) aside, what do you really want to do? Does your husband have an opinion? If you’ve been praying and seeking God, and one schooling choice keeps standing out to you, then go ahead and pursue that one. Look into different options, and keep praying that God would continue to make His way clear.
When we were looking into schooling, one of the biggest things that influenced my decision to homeschool was that a preschool opportunity for our oldest girls fell through. I ended up teaching them at home, and through that experience realized that homeschooling was something I really wanted to do with God’s blessing. But, for a dear friend of mine who ended up doing preschool at home with her little ones, it confirmed in her that they should send their kids to school.
Keep living for Him! One of my favorite verses is Romans 12:1-2- “Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. (2) Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” As we live for Him day in and day out- He will be working in our minds, so we will know what His will is. But certainly it does take prayer, and seeking, and trusting.
I’m praying for you, Beth! And would be honored to (try to) answer any questions you have.
~Jessica
What a beautiful and encouraging post! I’ve been struggling lately with wondering if I’ll really be able to teach our 6yo with Down syndrome everything he needs to know to reach his full potential. We know public school isn’t the answer for him (been there, done that) but I still question myself! I see other people’s blogs and feel discouraged if their little ones seem “further along” than he is. I need to remember to rely on the One who has called me to do this! Thank you for sharing your struggles- it helps others to not feel so alone in these hard decisions!
Thank you, Emily! I’m praying that God would flood you with His peace as you follow what He has called you to do! ~Jessica
I love your blog and go back to it often. God’s Word is powerful at every level of learning and learner. I have raised 4 children who are now making their own decisions and trusting God in their season of life! I teach in a Christian school and the culture that children are in , is SO different than when I was homeschooling mine. The greatest thing you can teach your children is character which is not intentionally taught in Christian homes today. Keep doing what you are doing. This blog is a record of God’s faithfulness in your life( when my children were little, I kept a prayer journal and cried out to Father with words, tears, Scripture and recorded His answers so I wouldn’t forget all He had done. Thank you for your committment and gift of writing! Kay Rew
Kay Rew, What a precious testimony- thank you for your wise words and your sweet encouragement!
Have a blessed day!
~Jessica
Is it deficult to homeschool. I want to start this year but i kind of freak out. How do i get started? How do stay calm and loving with 6 kids and homeschool?
Hi Rosa! Your questions are so honest and good and deep! Questions we should all ask ourselves, and prayerfully bring before God. Homeschooling is a lot like other parts of motherhood… challenging and difficult, but so precious and beneficial and wonderful at the same time. And the only way to stay kind and loving through it all- is to be filled with the Spirit, and to allow Him to walk through you. Thankfully, God also pours out His forgiveness when we fail (which we will), but we can’t do much without continually living in His strength and grace. The first thing I would do is to pray, pray, pray about it, and maybe even write out your reasons for and against homeschooling. Talk with your husband- if he’s not on the same page, it could be a very difficult road. If God is leading your family to homeschool, then I’d start researching curriculum. We’ve fallen in love with “Heart of Dakota”- but there are SO MANY out there that are very good, or you can come up with your own. This is just the very first steps. Please let me know if you have more questions, and I’ll do my best to answer.
Have a blessed day!
Jessica